THE TINY MICROPHONE

I said Mass at Good Shepherd Convent in Baguio. It happened to be the Feast of Sto Niño. When Mass was about to begin, I had a little problem with the tiny microphone on my vestments. While struggling to put it on, I mindlessly said to myself, ‘Even their microphone is so small, like a Sto Niño …’ – unaware that the mike was on. I was so embarrassed when I saw the people smiling. Obviously they heard what I said. Me and my big mouth!

BLOW YOUR HORN

We were on our way to Kalibo, capital of Aklan. Mr Louis, one of the benefactors of the Pink Sisters, was seated next to the driver. All of a sudden a cow crossed the road. Luckily, the driver was able to step on the brake right away. I was amused when I heard Mr Louis say, ‘That cow doesn’t know how to blow her horns.’

ON MY OWN

The Bukas Loob sa Diyos Charismatic Community invited me to say Mass at Home Sweet Home in Baguio. The first reading was done by a couple, the husband reading the first part, the wife the second. The responsorial psalm and second reading were read in the same way by two other couples. Then came the Gospel. Before reading it, I said, ‘Since I have no wife, with your permission, let me read the whole Gospel…’ to the laughter of the group.

WHO’S THE COOK?

We ordered pancit canton in one of the restaurants in Boracay. While eating it I asked the waitress in a serious tone, ‘Who cooked this?’ She nervously replied, ‘Why?’ ‘It’s so delicious. I liked it very much!’ I said. The waitress was so relieved! She must have really thought something was wrong with the pancit.