‘Why me? Why me?’
By Anne B. Gubuan
This is the vocation story of Fr Finbar Maxwell from Ballyfermot, Dublin, Ireland, who was ordained as a Columban priest in 1988. The author is Assistant Editor of MISYONonline.com.
Anne, far left, Father Finbar, far right, Pililla, Rizal, 28 September 2016
I am always spellbound listening to vocation stories. They are almost always stories of faith and courage, the pain of letting go and braving the oceans of a missionary journey. What makes these stories extra fascinating for me is the fact that these missionaries leave their families without the promise of going back to be with them again. I don’t think I have or will ever have that kind of courage.
‘I wish I could be praying what they pray.’ Sr Teresita was a young student when she first uttered these words to herself. Their house was just across from Immaculate Conception College (ICC, now La Salle University), Ozamiz City, run by the Columban Sisters in the 1950s. She would always watch the Sisters pacing back and forth saying their prayers. She even wrote a poem about these Sisters praying. I asked her, ‘How did you know you wanted to become a nun?’ She answered, ‘Longing for a vocation is a longing for God. The Lord calls us in several ways. There was just something inside, a kind of longing for the Lord that continued to persist’.
I was a fresh graduate from college and eager to land a job. I applied for a part-time job in Misyon magazine. I came to Father Niall’s office for an interview. ‘Don’t worry, I won’t bite you,’ was his greeting to me, aware of the anxiety written on my face. He asked me how many books I’d read in the past five months. When I said, ‘Six,’ he smiled from ear to ear. I was hired. Since then I got addicted to reading even more.
