We do not have the answers to every question – but the very asking of the question is the beginning of the answer. So why don’t you send us your questions and let us together find the answers to our questions.
WHY DO WE HAVE TO CONFESS TO A PRIEST?
I do not want to go to a confession on a one-to-one basis. I prefer to ask forgiveness for my sins from God personally. Or would general absolution do?
Of course, we can confess our sins to God directly. God is always merciful to us and He is always ready to listen to us and welcome us back into His arms. But a Catholic confession to a priest is a sign of reconciliation, of one’s willingness to be reunited with the Church and God.
Priests are God’s representative, they are authorized by Jesus to absolve sins in His name (Matt 16:19). When you go to a priest for confession, he can give you his consoling words, share his own views and most of all, pray for you.
You can also go for general absolution which is only given very seldom.
CHURCH INFALLIBILITY
Did the pope’s apology for the inquisition threaten the Church’s infallibility?
The Pope is only infallible when speaking on faith and morals to be held by all the faithful and when he does this EXPLICITLY and that is very rare. So the Pope’s apology did not affect this. Infallibility has nothing to do with the sinfulness of the Pope himself or of the Church’s members. We are a sinful people in a sinful world so there are many things to be sorry for and to ask forgiveness for and to apologize for. Though not everyone has been in favor of the many apologies which the Pope has made during the period of the millennium.
By the way, in my opinion, the “Infallibility” of the Pope actually limits his power because by tying it down to explicit and specific cases you avoid people taking his every word as Gospel… that would create chaos. The last time infallibility was invoked was for the doctrine of the Assumption of Our Lady into Heaven, that was 1950.
BIBLE OR TRADITION
Why do we have to look for the Catholic teaching in the Catechism of the Catholic Church? Is our Bible not enough? I do not think we should base our teachings also on Traditions. In Mark 7:8-9 and 13, Christ rejects tradition. “Neglecting the commandment of God, you hold to the tradition of men.” The Bible is enough to base our lives on. All the answers are replied in the Bible. It is our manual of Life.
As I understand this question, you have one basic problem. You feel that the Bible alone is adequate source of full Christian Revelation. That is the position of most Protestant churches, though not all. That is not the position of the Catholic Church or the Orthodox Church. Consider this: St. Paul was writing in the fifties of the first century. You are aware of his letters and you may be surprised to notice that in his many letters he NEVER quotes to gospels “St. John says…” or “St. Mark… says” and so on. The reason is simple: the Gospels were not yet written and would not be written for maybe another fifty years in the case of St. John. So when telling the Corinthians about the Last Supper, he does not say, “It says in St. Matthew or St. Luke …” rather he says: “It was HANDED ON to me.” Now the word to hand on by word of mouth in Latin is traditur from which we get the English word tradition. The early Church knew what it knew by Tradition. And even when the Gospels were written St. John said, “If all things that Jesus said and did were written down the whole world would not be enough to contain the books.” A bit of poetic exaggeration but I think we get his point.
Even after the last Gospel was written (which Catholic, Protestant and Jewish scholars put at about the year 95) there was still argument among Christians as to which of the many Gospels and Holy Writings should be included in the Bible. It was not until the middle of the fourth century that Church councils finally fixed on the present books, so excluding the Gospel of Thomas, the Gospel of Mary Magdalene, The Shepherd of Hermes, The Epistle of St. Clement and many other beautiful Christian writings. It is true that Catholics often stray from the teaching of the Scriptures and need to be brought back but the Scriptures themselves are the Child of the Church and would not exist without it and ultimately it is the Christian Church as a community and not the individual who interprets these writings. Otherwise, you get two genuine Christians, both believing in the scriptures – one concluding that Jesus is Divine, the other concludes that He is only human.
SECRET MARRIAGE
Is there such a thing as a ‘secret marriage’? Is it valid?
Strictly speaking there is no such thing as a ‘secret’ marriage because by its nature marriage is a public act declaring to the community that this particular couple have become husband and wife. It would be chaotic if no one knew who was married and who was not. Lots of problems would arise as you can well imagine. But for various good reasons, sometimes financial, people might like their marriage ceremony to be discreet or private. But those marriages will still be registered in the official books which are open to the public.
CIVIL WEDDING FIRST
If the couple gets married civilly and they decided to get married in church after a few months or years:
A.) Will they need to go through pre-cana seminars or have marriage banns said?
No, they will not need to have the marriage banns read but since a pre-cana seminar is normally required they will have to go through this. It is arranged by the parish. However, if they have been married civilly for a long time the parish will probably not insist on this.
B.) Can they get married by themselves, I mean them and perhaps a witness or two?
I assume you refer to private ceremony done quietly in the church and not in the glare of the parish Mass. The answer is yes.
C.) Can they just present their marriage contract to the priest and ask him to grant them the church’s blessings?
This seems to be almost the same as your question ‘b’ except that there has to be two witnesses present. The witnesses represent the community in this case. And although quiet and private it will not just be a blessing but a regular exchange of marriage vows. Not secret but private.